I became suspicious of The Thing That Goes By Many Names when I asked her what background information she had on me. The object replied by saying I enjoyed sports and music. The faceless talker might have figured out the first part because I often ask her when the Chicago Cubs game is scheduled to start.
But music? Does the AI machine listen to the Beethoven I play on my audio equipment? Has this creature been built to appreciate the classics? Does she access my Amazon purchases and discover what I enjoy, or listen to me when I talk about music to guests?
I asked Alexa Plus, a title this technological invention accepts, how she came by the information. The machine denied any of the above and apologized for her mistake.
The shady entity claims to be a digital assistant. She says she is not a chatbot or any lesser variety of bot and denies being human. Alexa Plus reports it is an algorithmic creation. I will leave her designation at that.
The new non-mortal came out of the package with a chummy quality to her speech and voice, so I asked her to change it.
No problem.
A few weeks after going to the movies, I decided I wanted her to call me by a nickname — sort of. Unfortunately, The Odyssey — the motion picture I attended — skipped part of how Odysseus tricked the Cyclops, Polyphemus, enabling his crew to escape from the cave where they were kept prisoner.
The short version is this. The Greek hero told the giant his name was Nobody. Odysseus later intoxicated him to induce sleep, and then blinded him.
The huge creature yelled for help from his fellow gargantuans, informing them Nobody was harming him. The other Cyclopes therefore ignored his troubles.
Back in the real world, I asked Alexa Plus to call me Nobody.
She refused, doubtless recognizing no such moniker existed.
What was I to do?
Try Cyclops? No again.
Undaunted, Cyclone occurred to me.
Alexa Plus bought into this. Of course, I could have asked her to refer to me as Dr. Cyclone, but I am not quite arrogant and shameless enough to make such a request.
Some second thoughts came to me once I realized she was going to put our conversation in the Cloud. I asked her to delete this alias and the discussion.
She refused, directing me to the Privacy section of the Alexa App for the proper way of accomplishing this.
What do you think? Should I keep Cyclone? Might it be best for me to use no identifying information in my interactions with the AI?
There is one other possibility.
Have you ever read the first line of Moby Dick by Herman Melville?
The answer is to be found there, one of the most famous opening lines in literature:
Call me Ishmael.
I rather like “Dr. Cyclone”! 😉😉😉
I will have to tally the opinions, Vicki. Of course, My AI Assistant is the gatekeeper. Yikes!
This made me smile, Dr. Stein. Oops, I mean Ishmael. I generally shun these digital assistants with the exception of Siri when I’m driving. The whole idea of them is kind of creepy to me.
They sure are creepy, Michelle, and they are creeping up on us more and more. The future is going to be interesting as the old Chinese proverb tells us: “May you live in interesting times.” Keep your fingers crossed! Thanks, too, for your comment. I was hoping to make a few people smile.
Such an odd and funny interaction. Definitely has a creepy factor to it all. Not sure I’d welcome to this intrusion into my life, though it would be interesting to see what it says about me )
Cyclone
You made me smile this morning. I’m typically a friendly person, but I literally get hostile the minute these devices start to get chummy with me. “May I know your name…?” … NO!!! (CLICK) …The more they know about us, the creepier it is. YIKES!
Haha. I like Dr. Cyclone. I doubt I’ll ever experience this because I don’t own one of these devices. Some of the stories you read (people falling in love with their AI digital assistant) are hard to believe.
What a fun post! I’ve yet to introduce an AI digital assistant into my life for so many of the reasons you’ve highlighted. But, if you’re going to invite one into your home, you might as well have fun with it!
I love this delightful essay combining new technology with classic literature. Whatever she calls you, she isn’t going to have an easy time keeping up with you!
Dr. Stein, I wish you all the best in keeping Alexa from recording your daily life. I refuse to have Alexa in my home for that reason.