Imagine you are standing in an endless, unmoving line. An upcoming appointment looms, and you will be late. Frustration and unexpressed anger bubble up, aimed at an old man or woman at the front of the queue who can’t locate and dig out the wallet buried in a pocket or purse.
It’s about time—the time that slips away, the time things take, the clocks, and the numbers on your phone. When you get old enough, the days start to pass in a flash.
Robert Southey put it this way:
Live as long as you may, the first 21 years are the longest half of your life.
You won’t be able to read all the books you want, see all the concerts, consume every binge-worthy series, or visit all the countries.
Perhaps you should slow down and consider how best to use your time. Would “less” become “more.” More fulfilling?
What have clever people said about this?
Mark Twain wrote:
There isn’t time—so brief is life—for bickerings, apologies, heart-burnings, callings to account. There is only time for loving—& but an instant, so to speak, for that.
Clara Spaulding was a family friend to whom Twain, Sam Clemens’s pen name, offered that advice on August 20, 1886. He was 50 when he penned this letter and 74 when he died.
Some other thoughts on the subject of mortality and time’s brevity:
After all, what is death? Just nature’s way of telling us to slow down.
A. Alvarez identified the quote as an insurance proverb in 1979.
Kingsley Amis suggested the following:
Death has got something to be said for it:
There’s no need to get out of bed for it;
Wherever you may be
They bring it to you, free.
Sounds like breakfast in bed to me. Not what you ordered, of course.
Back to Twain, he knew he had wasted time when young, perhaps reinforcing his advice to Clara Spaulding 10 years later:
Ignorance, intolerance, egotism, self-assertion, opaque perception, dense and pitiful chuckleheadedness—and an almost pathetic unconsciousness of it all, that is what I was at nineteen and twenty (1876).
Clearly, Twain gave more than a bit of thought to the passage of time, some of it amusing. Here is a quote from a letter to his mother when he turned 43 in 1878:
I broke the back of life yesterday and started downhill toward old age. This fact has not produced any effect on me that I can detect.
T.S. Eliot, another well-remembered writer, seems to have wanted to get on with things, reckoning that if he were closer to his end, there would be some advantages:
The years between 50 and 70 are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down. (1950, age 62).
Ben Franklin had some advice for those of us who wish to be remembered:
If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing. (Poor Richard’s Almanc, 1738).
I wonder what he would say about blogging?
At age 20 (1726), Franklin wrote guidance for himself in the form of 13 virtues:
- Temperance. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
- Silence. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
- Order. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
- Resolution. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
- Frugality. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
- Industry. Lose no time; be always employ’d in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
- Sincerity. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and if you speak, speak accordingly.
- Justice. Wrong none by doing injuries or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
- Moderation. Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
- Cleanliness. Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, clothes, or habitation.
- Tranquility. Be not disturbed at trifles or at accidents common or unavoidable.
- Chastity. Rarely use venery for health or offspring, but never dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.
- Humility. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.
Goethe, the towering German polymath, had a generous take on man’s demise, at least in some cases:
Mozart died in his six-and-thirtieth year. Raphael at the same age. Byron only a little older. But all these had perfectly fulfilled their missions; and it was time for them to depart, that other people might still have something to do in a world made to last a long while (1828).
Are all of us as sure of our mission as Mozart was?
George Bernard Shaw shared a remarkable view of the male gender to be found in The Revolutionist’s Handbook of 1903:
Every man over 40 is a scoundrel.
Nowadays, one only says that about the cheerleaders for a political party other than ours.
On a more positive note, Corot, the French landscape and portrait painter, offered this:
In July, when I bury my nose in a hazel bush, I feel 15 years old again. It’s good! It smells of love! (1867)
He would be 71 that year, suggesting that love can live and grow into old age.
But let’s leave the last word to a lady of wisdom and cleverness. This comes from Lady Astor, the first woman to become a member of the British Parliament:
I refuse to admit that I am more than 52 even if that does make my sons illegitimate.
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Grombo created Morning Fog at the Golden Gate Bridge. A.F. Bradley took Mark Twain’s 1907 photo. Joseph-Siffred Duplessis painted the Ben Franklin Portrait, and Jean-Antoine Houdon created the Franklin Bust in 1778. Finally, the 1923 picture is of Nancy Astor (Viscountess Astor) in 1923. Her dates are 1879—1964. All these came from Wikimedia Commons.
I’m fascinated by ben Franklin’s list made at age 20. I’m so different than I was at 20. I like that last one — imitate Jesus and Socrates. I have familiarity with jesus and things I admire about him, or the story of him. I have much to learn about how to imitate Socrates. But since that guideline was labeled “humility,” I would like to learn.
Socrates is one thinker no one should miss, Susan. As you might know, he didn’t leave any writings of his own. All we have are the writings of others who tell about him and recall his conversations. Plato, one of his students, is the main source, and he offers an almost endless number of dialogues between Socrates and others. The Socratic Method of questioning remains, for me, perhaps the best way to learn.
As to Jesus, you might also know that Thomas Jefferson’s “Bible” was a self-created thing. He chose to remove anything but the things that Jesus said, rather than what was written about him. You are in for a treat on both counts.
As to changing after 20, it seems that Franklin continued to consult his list as he aged. I’m afraid, however, I am no Franklin scholar.
Thanks for your commenting.
i did not know that about thomas jefferson but i guess i have my own version of what i have kept from the bible. it would be an interesting exercise to create a document of those verses.
as for socrates, i have a little knowledge about a lot of things but am master of few. i am familiar with the socratic method but have not internalized in the way I would like.
makes sense that mr franklin consulted his list throughout life. i have had a long journey of rejecting the legalism i adopted as a child. his list has much to commend it though.
The fact that you rejected some of the legalism with which you grew up is remarkable, Susan. I don’t doubt that it took more than a little courage.
I love the Southey quote and it is so very true
Indeed, Beth. There are a couple of ways to look at the quote.
First, that time speeds up and therefore the first half is equal, in a psychological, experiential sense, to the rest of one’s life.
The second is to remember that the first 20 years is full of “first times.” Things like learning to speak, learning to skip. learning to play various games, learning to read, the first feelings of emotional attraction, going to school, making friends, and first love, etc. Thus, the intensity of feeling attached to the first 20 years can be said to be equal or greater and more eye-opening than the remainder of life. Thanks, Beth.
that does make so much sense. and luckily I’m still learning something new most every day
Some have a mission in life to fulfill, some have lessons to learn, and for many of us, it’s a mashup of the two. Time is a precious resource, none of us knows how much we’re given.
A mashup indeed, Tamara! Uncertainty for sure, though many of us do our best to avoid the thought of the end of our life. Martin Heidegger thought it was impossible to fully grasp one’s own demise. It may be that to face the world’s present dilemmas, we need to contemplate it enough to be realistic about the existential threats now facing us. Thanks for your comment.
Very true, the existential threats are quite concerning at this present time. I know I don’t like thinking about my future demise, I can only hope it would be peaceful and pain-free! The uncertainty is what is so disconcerting to all of us!
Feeling a tad overwhelmed these days, I’ll confess the T.S. Eliot quote made me smile. 😉
So sorry to hear that, Vicki. At least I’m glad you got a small boost from T.S. Eliot. Feel better!
Aww…thanks! Your post was well-timed! Doing well…just wish I could create more hours…more time. But I know I’m not alone in that regard. Many thanks, dear Dr. Stein. Happy Sunday to you. 🥰
Good morning Dr. Stein!
I’m a bit stuck on that bridge picture…I think it says quite a bit- no words needed. While I’m not obsessed with time, how I choose to use it, or even how much is left, aging absolutely puts the concept of time as an ethereal presence floating around off my shoulder every so often popping into view then scuttling farther away. When I changed the name of my blog to Closer to the Edge time was clearly on my mind, relative to the past and what I have no control over into the future. I know that I’m nearing a precipice, but when is a mystery I’d like to keep in place for now.
Yes, do hold on to the mystery. This is a very personal choice. As to the photo, I was on X (a place I visit briefly, as a rule) when I found many beautiful photos of foggy scenes. That took me to Wikimedia Commons for the one in question. It was only after I’d written my post that I realized it fit the topic, as well as providing the beauty captured in the scene.
I don’t doubt that you will make good decisions about your use of time. It is doubtless something one must revisit occasionally to do so. Thanks, Deb.
A thought-provoking post, Dr. Stein. Benjamin Franklin’s list of 13 virtues at such a young age is quite impressive. I’ve found time very deceptive. As you’ve also observed, “the days start to pass in a flash” as we get older. By then, it’s too late to make up for lost time. Better to live in the present moment and open oneself to opportunities presented.
You are spot on, Rosaliene. The problem of not having the time to redeem the past stops many people from looking back and reconsidering their opinions. I agree with living in the present but I have found that I also learned a lot about myself and the world by looking back, as well. The trouble of course, is facing some of the darkness. Thank you for your provocative comment.
Ah, so many humorous and wise takes. Funny how much Mark Twain could capture in a sentence or two. Which reminds me of one of my favorites from him, “I didn’t have time to write you a short letter, so I wrote you a long one.”
The list from Ben Franklin is interesting – especially at age 20.
Thank you, Dr. Stein, for another gift of perspective!
Thank you, Wynne. And the question of the unprecedented conditions and speed of living still waits for an answer. I wish I had one.
Love that final quote! Sent from my iPad
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Yes, a clever lady, Lori. Thanks!